If you don’t like the contents of this post, if you’re a little offended, that’s ok. That means it’s probably written for you. My suggestion, read it a few times. Then follow the advice in the last line of the email.
At this time of the year, a few of us make promises to ourselves that we rarely keep. New Year New You, New Years Resolutions, I get it, as the year comes to a close it is the perfect time for reflection. That reflection is usually followed by a projection of what we want the next year to look like, we set our resolutions and stop there. Fast forward 6 months and we are in the same place doing the same shit as we were late December. I know because I have these conversations all too often with new humans at Virtus.
Fortunately, Virtus isn’t the kind of gym where we get flooded with well-intentioned yet set up for failure New Years resolutioners. We attract the kind of people who commit, stick at it and get results, I’m proud of that. I know our induction process has a part to play in that, but that’s for another email.
We don’t fail due to a lack of desire. Desire comes first and foremost. You need to know what you want. We fall down because we don’t give adequate time to stop and prepare for the trials and tribulations that lay ahead.
Change is hard, and if you don’t go into it with a well thought out plan, you’re bound to get lost along the way. We miss the forest for the trees, instead, we need to begin with the end in mind and understand that you’ll fail a lot along the way. Whether on not you break through those failures is completely and totally your responsibility.
This much I know is true, you are completely responsible for your life. If you think that you have any less than ultimate control over your life you’ve already lost. It’s up to you. Not your mum or brother or partner or boss, you. As soon as you put the locus of control in something external to you (ie Keto Diet or online program with no coach) it’s all too easy to pass the blame when things don’t go as planned. When it’s on you, there’s nobody to blame but yourself.
Sometimes you can’t control what happens to you in life, we know this.
However, you can control how you feel about it and of course, what you do about it.
The victim mentality, the poor me, the life happens to be instead of because of me mindset, is all too common. Nobody wins if you’re the victim. Nobody really cares if you complain and whinge and whine. Take responsibility for what you’re achieving, or what your’e not.
If you really want to succeed here’s a little list of boxes to tick.
1. Practice Daily Gratitude
2. Take Responsibility for your life
3. Create a plan
4. Set goals shaped by your desires
5. Enlist the support of your allies
6. Write lists, revel in ticking them off
As soon as your focus turns from negativity (poor me) to gratitude (appreciation for what you have) your whole world changes. Studies have shown that daily gratitude can increase happiness by 25% in 10 weeks. If you’re happy, and you have something to work towards, you’re winning, achieving, successful. All of those things. Right now, all of us have and are more than we need.
The Ray Dalio quote below is spot on
Enlist the support of your allies, but enlist wisely. We live in a society where the tall poppy syndrome is all too common. I can’t count the number of times where I’ve heard complaining about successful businesses being ‘too busy’ or hearing off the cuff comments about how easy it must be. Shut the fuck up.
Dear Complainers, do something about it. Yours sincerely, Contributors.
If you choose the right allies, you can’t fail. Because even when you do fail, they pick you up, teach you something and help you get moving again.
This topic gets me so fired up because I see and talk to so many different people who are stuck in a life they don’t love.
It is your responsibility to create a life worth living. If you settle for less that’s on you. Blame can’t exist.
To quote from the great Jim Rohn ‘ Your life, my life, the life of all of us, will either serve as a warning or an example.
A warning of the consequences of neglect, self-pity, a lack of ambition or direction.’
OR
An example of talent put to use, of discipline self-imposed and of objectives clearly perceived and intensely pursued.
Take control of your life. Chase your dreams that are fuelled by your desires, enlist the support of your allies, they want to see you succeed (mostly) and remember that whatever happens or doesn’t happen, it’s your responsibility.
Onwards and upwards.
Wallace
Ps. The graph below designed by the great J Pulse. Enjoy
