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Life By Design

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There are an incredible amount of uncontrollable aspects of our lives. Where we are born, the level of prosperity or poverty we are born into, the current economic climate, other people’s perceptions and actions, the weather, acts of god and pretty much everything that happens to us.

What we can control however, are our behaviours, attitudes and responses to all of the above. If you get cut off in traffic today, you can decide to react and respond with an outburst or frustration, or you can take a breath and realise that the other person is probably having a rough day, and needs to be cut some slack.

Here is where I contradict myself: We are completely in control of our lives. As long as we choose to focus on the things we can influence. Life will happen, but how we respond to that will determine our outcomes. In the Determinism vs Free Will debate I definitely lean towards the former but that’s a conversation for another day.

I had a couple of epiphanies this week one while talking to a couple of our young coaches on a podcast (Shoutout to Jas and Tessa) and one while driving back from Healesville.

They were both during discussions about the lives we choose to live, how we can create opportunities, and decide exactly how we spend our day. I’m not naive enough to think that we can blow off all responsibilities and live completely carefree, but I definitely think that we can get much close to this than we are led to believe.

I call this Life By Design

Let me use my life as an example. I’ve always been pretty ambitious and excited to achieve and succeed. But i never really saw myself working 9-5 or being under the thumb of someone who cared more about profit and the bottom line than they did about making the world a better place. In 2013 I was at a loss as to what I was going to do for the rest of my life.

Throughout 2014, I explored, I asked questions, I tried things, I failed and I learnt a lot about myself and about the world. The most important lesson that I wasn’t able to articulate at the time, was that you can create the life you want to live. Simple as that. As the great Tom Hafey used to say “If it is to be, it is up to me”. The important realisation that must come quickly after this, is that it can take a long time, a lot of hard work, blood, sweat and tears to be able to live the life you want to live. Unfortunately, you can’t just quit your job, sit on the couch and expect things to happen. You need to get your hands dirty, and for a long period of time.

“If it is to be, it is up to me” Tom Hafey

I’m telling you this because earlier this week, I had a couple of conversations which highlighted how much of my life is by design. I’m by no means at the finish line, I struggle and fail and suffer like everyone else, but the majority of my working week I am fortunate enough to be able to create the life I want to live.

For example this week I have: Recorded 4 podcasts with incredible people. I ran 20 humans through a Goal Setting and Behaviour change workshop. I have Coached Groups and Individuals at Virtus. Attended the start of our first Drops of Juniper Gin Distillation (Batch #001). I have spent time writing. Reading and watching content which allows me to hold more space and grow my capacities. I have connected and collaborated with incredible people. I have spent a little bit of time kicking the footy and I even snuck in a nap a few days ago. There’s plenty I want to change, but I understand that this is a process and good shit takes time. I need more sleep. I need to look after my health, and I want to spend more time with KP. But at the end of the day, those things are within my control.

The way I look at it, is that I am lucky enough to get to do this each week. But it didn’t happen by accident, It’s not without struggle, and hardship (some days I feel more lost than ever) but when we realise how little we need to be happy, and how grateful we should be for what we have, life isn’t half bad.

I love asking people the following question. Because it opens up a whole plethora of opportunities for the future. Opportunities that are waiting if you commit, be patient and do the work.

What are you excited for?

Here are 5 things I’m incredibly excited for.

  1. Batch #001 of Drops of Juniper GIN. Is on it’s way. You can Pre-Order HERE. I’m excited for this because it’s been a process, a long time coming, a lot of work has gone into this but most of all I’m excited because it’s Six local guys doing their best to do chase their dreams and do good things.

  2. Our business Virtus Performance is growing and impacting peoples lives for the better both within our team and amongst our incredible community.

  3. I’m a few weeks away from launching a new mentorship and education program called True North. This is centred around helping people Discover | Cultivate | Evolve their purpose and meaning. Their why. Their true north.

  4. Next week we welcome a new coach to the fold at Virtus HQ. Jasmine Birch who has been one of the most committed, dedicated and hardworking young human’s I’ve had the pleasure of meeting and teaching.

  5. To spend the rest of my life with my wonderful Fiance.

What are you excited for?

If you don’t have anything, buy some Gin 🙂

Be amazing. Live a life by design.


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